With Andy Murray not long off Wimbledon’s centre court and the image of him lifting that golden cup, Britain is basking in both his success and the unexpected sunshine. It seems that we all get a lift.
Yet it is easy to forget that similar, seemingly imperceptable reasons can hold people in depression. While we might be able to point the finger at a trigger event there is a process which sustains our low mood. Often the sufferer in counselling will talk about knowing what is wrong or that they know other people’s opinions shouldn’t matter as much as their own yet emotionally they find that is their reality. There is a sense of being judged of not being good enough. Of being watched.
There are of course many ways to tackle this and indeed for those with Seasonal Affective Disorder, more bright light or indeed sunshine may be part of the cure, however, getting help and talking about your feelings should be high on your agenda, While of course a counsellor is an excellent choice, anyone that you feel you can trust and can open up to is a good start.
The process is about being honest with yourself, challenging those thoughts really letting the daylight in on those negative thoughts. What most people find is that some thoughts can be immediately dismissed. some thought need more consideration and some thought you may find really alarm you.
In identifying theses thoughts, you have started to highlight the priorities for change in your life. Of course there are somethings you cannot change in your life. Imagine your thoughts to be about a family barbeque and you are worried that everyone will think you a failure if it is a flop, what if it rains?. Well there is nothing you can do about the weather, but you can control your preparation so that there are alternatives. You can use a forecast to plan. You can decide to focus on the parts of the day that you can control. Taking this to a more real world example you may find that your job is terrible, you hate your boss, its a back stabbing environment, but you have the bills to pay etc. You can’t change all of that you can’t just walk out. But you can choose to leave, you can be prepared through your CV, and talking to people about your plans. Perhaps volunteering will open up new skills and opportunities. Perhaps by investing more time in things you like to do outside of work you can change the focus so you care about what you do in work less and less. Each little bit of control you wrest back for yourself is one bit of power to make you feel better about yourself and “weather the depression”.
Change one thing today see what a difference it makes