One of the more difficult emotions to deal with is anger. Yet it seems everywhere in our society today. Road rage, office rage even trolley rage seem to have hit the headlines in the past 12 months.
Of course anger is not entirely a bad thing, like many of the things we see as difficult behaviours, it is an evolutionary system that hasn’t quite caught up with our 21st century lifestyle. Anger is a very effective way of showing when one human has transgressed the boundary of another.It might be taking your space in line or not obeying the rules that you are bound by. Anger is born out of that feeling of being able to do nothing else, frustration, a fear of being out of control.
If you feel that controlling anger is impossible and that your outbursts are hurting you and those around you. Perhaps at that point you should consider getting help for your anger.
Often anger management focuses on identifying the trigger points, but in a safe environment so that you can recognise the feelings and choose a different behaviour. For example you take exception to the way that a man across a bar looks at you when you drink drips on the table he then turns back to his friend and laughs. You assume that he has made some joke or comment about you so you go across to confront him. In that moment you are sure that you have seen that behaviour that man is laughing with his friends at your expense. Yet in that moment you don’t consider other possibilities. Perhaps he was looking in your direction while a joke was being told. You are afraid it was about you about laughing at you so you go straight to anger.
If you can express what you are going through what you feel when you get angry and are angry you already know your enemy and can start to become its master again. It is a frightening emotion for those on both ends of it so if you feel you need help you should seek out anger management classes.