There can be little doubt that there has been a rise in the amount of easily available porn in our society today. Changing attitudes to Sex and the availability of seemly endless porn sites on the internet have led to an increase in people describing themselves as sex addicts.
Who are sex addicts
Of course anyone who works with addiction will tell you that shame and guilt often surround any addiction. Often it is only when the addict themselves can admit they have a problem that they can ask for help and truly start on the road to recovery. Yet with sex addicts they seem to face a higher barrier, that society find sex difficult to talk about and sexual problems almost impossible to talk about. Even talking to family or close friends can seem impossible. There is a moral undertone which is in stark contrast to other addictions. The problem is particularly acute for the 25% of women who are sex addicts, where society frowns upon promiscuous behaviour in females.
Often sex addicts feel alone and isolated and just knowing that you are not the only one compelled to engage in sexual activity can in itself help. Understanding the struggle that others face and they are engaging in the same type of behaviours to try to protect themselves can make it easier to ask for help.
Often people are surprised to realise that sex addicts are getting little sexual pleasure from sexual addiction, it is like a drug or alcohol it is about the hit or the high not the act of getting there. Yet sex addicts will often describe intense sexual impulses, unusual sexual desires, they will find it difficult to make attachments. Yet often sex addicts are using sex to escape or anesthetise unhappy or painful feelings and find it easier to disregard the consequences of their sexual activities.
Fortunately there are treatments that can help sex addicts. They often mirror drug or alcohol approaches, while acknowledging the very different social and emotional context. Many clients find it easier to start with individual therapy to try to understand something of them before entering a program, but this is not a one size fits all approach. Counsellors and Physiotherapists trained in dealing with sex addiction are not there to judge your actions or preferences, but rather to help you bring the order to your life that you most desire.
Many sex addicts are opting for a few sessions of on-line counselling to begin to talk about the problem in confidence. This approach perhaps feels more secure in that there is a greater sense of control by the client. If you do think that you need help then it is available and perhaps taking a few steps will allow you to feel a great deal better.