It’s almost never discussed, a behaviour that many find shocking. Self harmers are almost always misunderstood, as many people say that they can’t understand the behaviour, so they feel even more isolated. Self harm is a range behaviours, perhaps most often associated with cutting, but sufferers burn themselves, break bones, bang their heads off walls. It is a way of coping with difficult emmotional circumstances and without help it can be very difficult to stop because it is the mechanism by which they cope with their lives.

Self harm knows no boundries so while you might associate self harm with the poorest in society, revelations by Princess Diana and Jesicca Innes that they self harmed show that it effects all places in socisety. It is as people stand up and be honest about their self harm that others begin to realise that they are not alone and that they make the subject more accessable for dicussion in society. There are many reasons for self harm, child sexual abuse is a common reason, but a feeling of self lothing or low self esteem, or guilt and blaming yourself for an event in your past are other common triggers.

One question that is often asked is why don’t they stop? Self harmers would like to stop they strive to stop but cutting is the way that you can cope. It can be about punishing yourself or about letting the anger out. To understand what is going on you need to understand just how alone, how little they value themselves. Indeed it has been suggested that one of the best things that you can do is to listen to let them talk about what is going on. Keep in mind that it is a coping mechanism, rather like we would cry or shout our anger, because of an emmotional situation. For teh self harmer the self loathing or low self-esteem directs the effects inwards so that they feel the effect of that emmotion about the situation.

Self harm can be defeated but it is a difficult road to travel so professional or group help is a good idea, yet if you can believe in one thing it could be that others who feel as bad as you do now have defeated this and you can too.