There is huge pressure on couples in the 21st century and particularly in the current economic crisis. At the best of times all relationships suffer ups and downs. Changes in each of the partners change the dynamics of the relationship. Perhaps there is even a sense that the person is not the one that you got together with or married. Perhaps you have drifted apart perhaps your relationship has reached a crisis point. Perhaps there is some event such as infidelity that makes you question the whole basis of your relationship.
So what can counselling do for you? Well there are two very clear possibilities, perhaps what you want is someone to work with to look at your feelings and understand how you see the relationship before deciding what to do next, perhaps you are questioning yourself and are unsure of your own feelings. Perhaps you even feel that your self esteem is not what it was and you need help to be whole again.
Equally perhaps you want to come as a couple and discuss your problems in a structured environment that promotes active listening and helps to really examine the issues through the lens of both partner’s view. Ultimately trying to find that way forward with which you will both be happy.
It may be that a combination of both is required
Couples going to counselling are often surprised at how much their relationship has changed since they first get together. Often one or both are looking for an earlier time when things were very different and there is almost a grief process at what has been lost. Yet as in all loss there are lessons, perhaps that very mourning helps you to realise the importance that you place on different aspects of your relationship.
Perhaps you have come to realise that you miss doing things together or that dating and intamacy is what you feel are missing from the relationship.
A counsellor can also help you when there is an affair or some other seemingly catastrauphic event in the relationship. Surprisingly, with hindsigh,t many couples who have had an affair in their relationship report that the healing process has made their relationship better because it forced them to work through the issues and understand why they were committed to each other. This may be difficult to believe if it has just happened in your relationship but the possibility is there.
So in conclusion going to a counsellor can offer you a lot of options for improving your relationship both as an individual and as a couple. At considerate counselling we can meet all of your needs.