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Relationship counselling self help part 1

Perhaps you are considering relationship counselling because the problems your partner and you are having. Perhaps you are kept awake at night wondering what will happen. Perhaps you even wonder if relationship counselling will work.

Couples have problems with a variety of issues, different libidos, problems with money, infidelity and just a break down in communications. But before you reach for the phone to arrange relationship counselling there are a few things that you might want to try.

However, as you would be told in any relationship counselling fixing a broken marriage or relationship is not an easy thing. It requires commitment, honesty and openness from both partners. It also has to be faced that one option is the relationship is over, while it may be furthest from both of your minds it remains a possibility if you can’t change enough to prevent problems in the future.

love in relationship counsellingThe first, and perhaps the key thing in fixing your relationship is to be open and honest in your communication. Both of you need to express how you feel about both the situation and the relationship. This is no time for assumptions; your partner cannot read your mind so make sure that you express how you feel. In relationship counselling especially with couples that have been together a long time there is a tendency (because of a shared history) to leave some things unsaid, “I love you” and it is important that they and indeed you, do not fall into this trap.  Also remember that conversation is a two way thing it is as important (if not more so) to listen to your partner.

In relationship counselling the ability to compromise is key too. We don’t get everything we want in life and a sign of good character is doing something even when you don’t want to do it. Perhaps In your house no one likes putting out the bins and no one likes cleaning the bathroom. At risk of stating the obvious by both compromising and doing one, you remove that martyred feeling you have when you take the bins out or you clean the bathroom for the second time that week.  This skill is necessary to help push through the mundane things in your life together to enjoy your relationship without having to go to relationship counselling

In our second part we continue to look at the key ways in which your partner and you can change to get all of the benefits of relationship counselling without going to see one.